…a chef attacked one of his staff in a rage after renowned food critic AA Gill reported that his meal was ‘disgusting’ (which later turned out to be a joke).

…disgraced labour MP Elliot Morley was beaten up in prison as fellow inmates stole his £3,000 Rolex watch

…Wayne Rooney prostitute Helen Wood was beaten up in a pub after taught from other drinkers who recognised her from the scandal.

All of these attacks have one thing in common of course…the victims just didn’t see it coming. Obviously that is the advantage any assailant has on his/her victim which is why we should always consider our personal safety as a matter of routine…it should be as normal a thought as remembering to brush your teeth every morning. Now, don’t get me wrong…I’m not saying live your life in fear or always look over your shoulder it’s just about safety…you check your car don’t you? The tyres? The oil? That you’ve put the handbrake on? That it’s not in gear before you start the engine? So apply the same principles….

….what do I have on my person (watch, money etc) do I need it all with me where I am going? Why, I have to ask did MP Elliot Morley have a £3,000 Rolex with him in prison?

….if you a well known figure in an area where you might attract unwanted attention, have you considered how you will get home? Prostitute Helen Wood would have been better placed to apply the ‘flight’ aspect of her adrenalin rush when other drinkers got abusive rather than ‘fight’. Choosing to confront a situation of conflict is not the safest option. If you have an escape route for goodness sake use it. Run.

For the poor employee who got pushed down the stairs by his irate chef I have two tips and this stands for any situation of conflict that you may find yourself in. First of all my assumption would be that the poor employee who was pushed down the stairs must have turned his back on his boss. So his boss had the advantage of surprise and impact – your two worst enemies….so tip number one….

1. Never turn your back on someone who is being aggressive towards you.

Our natural reaction when someone goes to attack us is to flinch away. My advice is to use this natural response to your advantage and convert your flinch into a forward movement and ideally a pivot to move out of the way. This is what I teach on my personal defence readiness courses and it does take some practice to apply. So tip number two is…

2. Convert your flinch into a forward pivot movement to get you out of the way.

Both these techniques work really well in situations when you find yourself in a conflict situation and keep you ready to protect yourself. But don’t be a hero, when the opportunity arises and it’s safe to do so, get the hell out of there.

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My friend brought this to my attention not because he’s a health and safety fanatic and knows of my work and personal interest in this area but to ask advice. He too had been grabbed by the wrist by a patient (he’s a care-worker) and while there was nothing serious to report about it, the patient being very frail he wondered what was the best way to release a grip such as this and ensure no harm to either himself or the patient.

So this week I thought I’d share with you my top tips for releasing yourself safely from a grip such as this.

Single Handed Parallel Grip.

If the agressor grabs you with the thumb on the inside of the wrist. Thumb – Inside- Turn In. Pull your hand back towards your own body to break contact with their palm. Push your elbow forwards towards the aggressor’s forearm. Step back to re-create the personal safety buffer zone.

I can’t go without a least a comment on the health and safety side of things that this example highlights. Employers put themselves, their employees and their clients/patients at risk if they do not ensure appropriate and regular physical intervention, personal safety skills and conflict management training . When deciding on a course please ensure it covers the legal side of things such as Health and Safety legislation and that your supplier has the appropriate accreditation such as edexcel the UKs largest awarding body for qualifications and The Institute of conflict management.

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There is a picture of the hold if you click here. This is a hold you find being used potentially in mental health situations or private security organisations. So for example it may be used on an aircraft.

The BBC ran a story last week connecting this research the death of Jimmy Mubenga, 46, who died not long after being restrained on his deportation flight out of Heathrow last year. Post-mortem examinations were inconclusive and three security guards employed by the escorting security organisation have been arrested and put on bail.

As I understand it the research involved forty volunteers who were put in a seated position and lent forward so their faces were close to their lap. They were then held in that position. The research suggested that it was the position rather than any force applied that was the main problem as the position restricted lung capacity and air flow. This would be worsened if your detainee was over-weight. The researchers expressed concerns that detainees in this hold may struggle to breathe but that their struggling could be misinterpreted by the enforcer who may push them lower into the forward position, making breathing even more difficult. I’m sure you get the picture. It’s a terrible image and highlights the challenges of security personnel ever more.

If you are in the security profession either as a security officer or as the CEO please take note. There are many good courses out there which will keep you and the general public safe and well. Invest your time and money wisely…you should look for a course that will cover these key elements:

ü Differentiates between holding, escorting and restraining and non-harmful seated restraint techniques and how to apply them.

ü Demonstrates and explains how to gradually de-escalate and relax a restraint to allow the subject being restrained to regain self-control.

ü Explores the risks associated with alcohol and drugs, knives and other forms of edged weapons in relation to the use of physical restraint.

ü Investigates the difference between non-harmful methods of control and more restrictive methods of control and when the use of such methods would be considered appropriate.

ü Explores all legal aspects of physical restraint and particularly that as it relates to Reasonable Force and Health and Safety.

ü Provides you with the physical skills required to handle potentially violent situations.

ü Provides you with the physical skills to safely control others whilst being compliant with legislation.

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The Greater Manchester Police  have charged the storage manufacturing company with corporate manslaughter as a result of the death of an employee when he fell through a fragile plastic roof panel on an industrial estate. I have also read that the company is charged under section 2 and 33 of the Health and Safety Work Acts 1974 (HSWA) for failing to ensure the safety at work of its employees.

So it is that the three directors are each accused of manslaughter by gross negligence under section 37 of the HSWA for failing to ensure the safety at work of their employees.

Notwithstanding the terrible tragedy of the dealth of a man I am pleased to see that the Corporate Manslaughter Act is being used and has not just been a paper exercise. I believe employers should look upon this act as an opportunity to really look at the personal safety of their employees. Equally employees should use this Act as a way to ensure they are getting everything they are entitled to receive to enable them to their jobs safely and effectively. This will include the environment they work in, the equipment used and the quality and frequency of the training they receive.

This applies to all types of workplace, not just where there are obvious risks such as in manufacturing or building services but also where personal safety could be an issue due to staff members interactions with the general public. The NHS for example, often reports violence from patients towards their staff, and this not always from the mentally unstable. So here we have a caring profession….not somewhere you would automatically think of as an environment in need of personal safety for its staff…that in reality needs to and in many cases does, provide personal safety training for it’s staff.

The first hearing for Lion Steel Ltd. Will take place on 2^nd August.

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This case is of interest to me because it raises…and not for the first time…the issue of the use of reasonable force when dealing with conflict situations.  It is as ever a highly sensitive area and without acurate eye witness accounts or cctv footage it may be impossible to unpick what happened on that night. The four securaity guards in question are not the only ones who should be called to question here as their employers also have a part to play. Did their employers ensure that they had recieved all the required and appropriate training?

For those of you that don’t know all door supervisors should hold an SIA licence.That gives them a basic knowledge to permit them to be legally employed as a security guard. But it’s a bit like getting your drivers licence. You don’t get your licence and then start racing formula one cars and so it is the case with security guards of busy nightspots.

Employers of such venues should know that additonal physical intervention and conflict management training is more than likely necessary if their venue is likely to attract situations of violence and aggression. Failure on their part to supply this is a breach, by them, of the Health and Safety Act. So they too have a part to play.

Now none of this helps the tragedy of Reece Lamude’s situation and the courts will decide the outcome of that later in the year. But I would like to hope that cases like this raise the importance to employers to provide appropriate training to their staff and also for employees to demand appropriate training if they believe they are at risk. It will all go along way to making it safer for us all whether we are an employee or a member of the public like Reece.

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This thought struck me as I was sat in a parents meeting at school this week. The Head spoke at length about the dangers of the internet, reminded us about the legal age of Facebook (13 by the way) and shared with us the school rules on internet usage. All great stuff don’t get me wrong but what about the..dare I say it..old fashioned stuff…they used to call it ‘stanger danger’ but I call it protecting youself…in otherwords self-defence.

So your average 13 year old knows how to detect a suspicious Facebook friend request but can they defend themselves from a variety of grabs? Navigating their way around youtube, twitter and myspace is second nature but how quickly can they work out the quickest possible escape route if confronted?

Can you see my point? Here are my quick  personal safety tips that are equally applicable to children and adults.

1. Be aware. Particulary when you are close to home. Research suggests that we ‘let our guard down’ when we are in familiar territory.
2. Look for incongruencies. E.g someone asking for the time if they have a watch on. Someone asking directions but not looking at you when you tell them. Trust your instincts…if something doesn’t seem quite right walk away.
3. Look for escape routes. If a car is following you and you are on foot then turn around forcing it to do a difficult (and conspicious) u-turn.
4. Be careful of short-cuts. Are they obscured from view? Can someone easily hide along the route? Never go alone or better still take the longer route home.
5. Carry a personal alarm. Just pop one in your pocket. It’s worth spending a little extra to get one that’s at least 136db.

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Now drawing sporting analogies to business or work scenarios is, in my book, a dangerous thing. At best you end up sounding pompous and at worst you just end up dragging up a load of old clichés. Don’t get me wrong I’ve had the privilege of hearing several sportsmen and women talk about their profession and draw links to positive thinking in the everyday and business world around us. Done well you can see where they’re coming from and yes, draw relevant parallels to your own life. Done badly you’re left thinking well…is preparing for my next important client meeting really the same as the training programme for an Olympic athlete?

But back to Wimbledon and what prompted my thoughts….I’ve been focusing on Emotional State Control this week for a client this is how being in control of your emotions is essential to manage conflict situations effectively. So understanding your triggers for fear and/or loss of emotional control are part of the process of learning how to control them so that no matter what situation you are in, whether you feel threatened or angered yourself, you always retain control of your emotions. This then supports you in being a really good communicator (see my P.O.L.I.T.E model on my website for more information). So I was watching Novak Djokovic and waiting to see if he would lose his temper like he did in the semi’s against Baghdatis where he smashed his racket three times in a rage. I was thinking surely it must be obvious to see it coming…here he is centre stage, immense pressure, everything riding on the match….could I see it either coming or him trying to control it? There are clues….facial expressions, where the eyes focus, breathing techniques…but put yourself in an everyday situation without the benefits of a camera close up and an obviously extreme situation and can you read the clues as easily?

It’s difficult which is why being in control of your own emotional state is so important so that if you suddenly find yourself in a situation with conflict or violence you are in control of your emotions and are ready to react effectively. You can anchor an emotional state by using one of your visual, auditory or kinesthetic cues. This is line with the NLP way of thinking. For instance, playing a certain type of music that makes you feel a certain way is an example of an auditory anchor but. This may be more difficult if a situation unexpectedly confronts you, but with practice you can become quicker at gaining control. If you are clever you can stack anchors to make it a really powerful exercise. All you need to do is think about a time when you felt good, the emotional state you were in, the confidence, control and calmness you felt and then pull on that memory to anchor control of your emotions.
All easier said than done of course which is why practice makes perfect or as I like to think..practice makes permanent – if you practice something wrong you can get good at doing it wrong. Which is one unarguable lesson every business practice can learn from the sporting world.

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To be honest it is a tool that can help with training but it’s not the magic bullet that will solve all of your training problems. However, that said it can help save money, time, resources and of course the environment – so it does have some genuine benefits.

I have pulled together a list of pros and cons of e-learning and listed them below, I have also borrowed some great points from the e-learning Guru, have a read and see what you think:

Pros

1. You can get a lot of material background and guidance into documents which people can read in their own time. Materials that will help a delegate hit the ground running when they come on a blended solution training course. They already have background knowledge and this is far better than starting from scratch.
2. It’s cost effective to use it.
3. Learning times reduced, an average of 40 to 60 percent, as found by Brandon Hall (Web-based Training Cookbook, 1997, p. 108).
4. Increased retention and application to the job averages an increase of 25 percent over traditional methods, according to an independent study by J.D. Fletcher (Multimedia Review, Spring 1991, pp.33-42).
5. You can buy several different courses in bulk.
6. It’s environmentally friendly.
7. It comes within a learning management system.
8. Proof of completion and certification, essential elements of training initiatives, can be automated. So the delegate can print off their own certificates if they so wish– again environmentally friendly.
9. Flexibility – the delegate can choose their own place and time to train.
10. The delegate can go into far more detail – by simply clicking on links in the copy.
11. The end of each section often has a quiz to test the delegate’s knowledge and understanding.
12. It saves on backfill costs (which are hidden and hardly ever measured within the public sector). This is when someone has to be paid where the other person goes off site to do the training.
13. The delegate can stop in the middle of the training and pick it up when they want.
14. Self-pacing for slow or quick learners reduces the stress of training and increases the delegates satisfaction.
15. It can be more engaging as it using a variety of methods to capture the imagination of the delegate.

Cons

1. Organisational mindset – there can be reluctance in some organisations to embrace new training methods.
2. Not having the necessary IT kit that can do the job (our courses use flash for instance – so not having flash on your computer could cause problems).
3. People not being organised or motivated to get the job completed when using e-learning they are doing it at their own pace, so it could take forever.
4. It isn’t accredited and there is no industry standard.
5. There is usually an up-front investment required, so budgets and cash flows often need to be negotiated to accommodate this.
6. Technology skill levels of the learners – if they can’t use a computer this will cause the trainer real issues.
7. Portability of training has become a strength of e-learning with the proliferation of network linking points, notebook computers, PDAs, and mobile phones, but still does not rival that of printed workbooks or reference material.
8. Reduced social and cultural interaction can be a drawback. The impersonality, suppression of communication mechanisms such as body language, and elimination of peer-to-peer learning that are part of this potential disadvantage are lessening with advances in communications technologies.
9. You can’t really learn self defence techniques using a computer. Practical application is far better in my opinion.

If e-learning is used in a blended approach, it will prepare the student by building up their general knowledge and guidance around the subject. If the delegate understands the statistics and industry issues etc, we can then take them through much more advanced strategies. This will give them a much higher level of training and give the employer a higher skilled individual.

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When people on the telephone call you and come across all angry and frustrated, it isn’t always because they are actually cross. Sometimes these are just mis-read signals by people and you need to be careful in making assumptions quickly, especially when using the telephone.

For instance, if the call is to the NHS, the caller might be frightened as they are trying to get some important test results to determine whether they have cancer or not. So it may be that they are simply on edge and frightened, not angry. However, the person on the other end of the telephone (NHS) might pick up the wrong signals.

The caller that has got the problem, knows that they have a problem, but the person on the other end of the telephone doesn’t understand it. If this happens (and it often does) it means there is very little rapport, if none at all, and the caller might start to come in with one or two different types of aggression depending on their state.

I have identified two types of aggression as either:

1. a: aggressive – they are venting anger but they are prepared to negotiate
2. A: Aggressive and not prepared to negotiate at all

As with many things I talk about in conflict resolution, this is all about building rapport because you have to build trust with the caller first before resolving anything.

Building Rapport – a: aggressive

On the telephone rapport is based on 84% tonality. In other words your attitude comes across in the tone of your voice. People are going to make their minds up quickly mainly based on your voice tonality. Your voice tonality is made up your volume, speed, pitch and your Timbre (the quality).

So if you start to match the voice tonality of the person on the other end, you are more likely to build some rapport with them. The easiest way to do this is to match the tempo/speed of their voice. Don’t match their aggression, just the speed! By doing this you are sub-consciously saying “I am like you. You can trust me because I am like you”. This is because the person we trust the most in the world is ourselves.

Just by doing this they will be far likelier to be receptive to your questioning or problem solving skills because they now have some level of trust in you. They are much more likely to take on your advice and take their time rather than simply ranting down the line at you.

If you can sort their problem you should do it quickly and SMART.

• S – Specific (Get to the route of the problem)
• M – Measureable (I will get back to you by 2pm this afternoon – did I get back to you)
• A – Alternatives (Giving the person different alternatives – refund, deduct money next month etc)
• R – Realistic (we will reimburse you etc)
• T – Time (I will get back to you by XXX – If you get back to them they will trust you because most people don’t get back)

Taking action with A: Aggression (not prepared to listen)

This is the most difficult person to deal with, you need some kind of pattern interruption by coming in at a slightly different angle. Now to do this you need to have their name and phone number before you do anything.

When you have all of their details, you tell them you won’t be able to help them whilst they are behaving like that.

My quick tips to deal with A: Aggression

1. You say the following quickly and bluntly:“I am not prepared to accept that behaviour”
2. You then hang up on them.
3. You then ring them back in about 15 mins with a new fresh tone offering to help.

You do this because it interrupts their pattern of anger. They didn’t expect you to put the phone down on them initially and they certainly didn’t expect you to ring them back. You can now offer them a gift – by solving their original problem.

Now they should like you a bit more because you have called them back and hopefully they are now a little a rather than a Capital A. They also know you will put the phone down on them if they get too aggressive. You have set the rules of the call. The 15-minute rule also doesn’t give them enough time to write a ranting email or letter of complaint, so you should have covered all bases.

I am not saying this works with every irate customer but these are good rules to go by.

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